Telling your significant other about IBS

Hello! I'm back after a lengthy hiatus. It's great to be back, y'all!

Telling my significant other about my IBS was one of the hardest things I've ever done, and believe me, that is saying a lot.

It was difficult mostly because I have always wanted to appear polished, accomplished, and in control. I especially wanted to appear that way to the most important people in my life, because I didn't want to scare them away. I didn't want to say, "Hey, you thought I was a pretty, smart girl but really I have an incredibly embarrassing disease that wreaks havoc on my body despite every effort I make to control it! I bet you find that very alluring!" Sound familiar?

And, let's face it, we are still living in an age where women are expected (or at least encouraged) to be beautiful, noiseless beings who magically emerge from the shower effortlessly gorgeous (but natural!) and whose bodies must never emit anything offensive whatsoever. Fans of the show "Sex and the City" may remember this episode:

at a yoga class
Carrie: I farted.
Samantha: Then move your mat away.
Carrie: Not now, I did it in front of Big [her boyfriend].
Samantha: Big mistake.
Carrie: You think? It wasn't a choice. I'm human. It happened.
Samantha: No, honey, you're a woman, and men don't like women to be human.

That's not some retro-chauvinist idea, folks; this episode is from 1998.

Fortunately, my significant other is a very caring, supportive person. He just listened. He asked for a little information. He always took care of me when I was sick, but now there is another dimension to his concern when I am ill.

At first, I regretted telling him. Dammit, I had let out my secret! There was no going back! Six years of elaborate smoke and mirrors down the drain!

But a few days later, and every day since, I have been relieved by my decision. As he and I got closer, the intricate web of excuses and explanations I crafted became harder and harder to design. And because he reacted so well to my IBS, I traded in tremendous anxiety for understanding and acceptance.

My hope is that each of you has someone in your life who knows about your IBS and supports and comforts you. Whether this person is a fellow IBS sufferer or someone with guts of steel, he/she has the potential to offer much-needed relief.